Da Widow An Da Judge Story
Jesus tell his guys one story fo show dem dat dey gotta pray erytime an no give up. He tell, “Inside one town, had one judge dat no sked God an no mo respeck fo da peopo. Had one widow ova dea inside dat town dat stay come by da judge fo beg him, ‘Try make tings right fo me! Cuz get one guy dat stay rip me off.’ Long time da judge neva like do notting. Den in da end he figga, ‘No matta I no sked God an I no mo respeck fo da peopo, dis widow stay bodda me, az why I goin make tings right fo her, so she no come no mo an wear me out!’ ”
Den Jesus, Da One In Charge, tell his guys, “Tink bout wat da judge tell, dat neva like do da right ting. You guys tink God no goin make tings right fo da ones he wen pick, wen dey stay beg him day time an nite time? You tink he goin take long time fo help dem? I stay telling you, he goin make tings right fo dem real fas. But I da Fo Real Kine Guy, an wen I come back, you tink I goin find peopo dat trus God hea on top da earth, o wat?”
Da Pharisee An Da Tax Guy Story
Jesus tell one story to da guys dat stay shua dey da good guys but all da odda guys, dey da bad guys. 10 He tell, “Two guys wen go da Temple Fo God fo pray, one Pharisee guy, an one guy dat colleck tax money fo da govmen. 11 Da Pharisee guy stan up an pray ony fo him lidis, ‘God, mahalo plenny dat I no stay jalike da odda guys, da guys dat steal, no do da right ting, fool aroun da odda guy wife, an even jalike dis guy hea dat colleck tax money. 12 Two time ery week, I no eat so I can pray, an I give da Temple ten percent from all da money I get.’ 13 But da guy dat colleck tax money wen stan up far away. He no even like look up to da sky, but he beat on his ches an tell, ‘God, I one guy dat wen do bad kine stuff. Give me chance!’ ” 14  18:14: Matt 23:12; Luke 14:11Jesus tell, “I tell you, wen dis tax guy go home, he get um right wit God awready. But not da Pharisee guy. Cuz whoeva make jalike he importan goin come not importan, an whoeva make jalike he not importan goin come importan.”
Jesus Pray Fo Da Small Kids
(Matthew 19:13-15; Mark 10:13-16)
15 Da peopo bring dea small kids by Jesus, cuz dey like fo him put his hands on top dea heads an pray fo dem. Wen Jesus guys see dat, dey scold da peopo cuz dey do dat. 16 But Jesus tell da kids fo come, an he tell, “Let da small kids come by me, an no tell um no can, cuz da peopo dat get God fo dea king, inside dey jalike dese kids. 17 Dass right! An I like tell you guys dis too: Whoeva no make God come his king jalike one small kid make um, God no goin come his king.”
Da Guy Dat Get Plenny Stuff
(Matthew 19:16-30; Mark 10:17-31)
18 One leada guy wen tell him, “Teacha, you good. Wat I gotta do fo get da real kine life dat goin stay to da max foeva?”
19 Jesus tell um, “How come you tell me good? Ony get One dat stay good, dass God. 20  18:20 a: Outa 20:14; Rules2 5:18; b: Outa 20:13; Rules2 5:17; c: Outa 20:15; Rules2 5:19; d: Outa 20:16; Rules2 5:20; e: Outa 20:12; Rules2 5:16You know da Rules From God: ‘No go fool aroun da odda guy wife, no go kill nobody, no rip off nobody, no bulai any kine bout nobody, show respeck fo yoa faddah an muddah.’ ”
21 Da guy tell, “Ho, Teacha! From small kid time I stay do all dat stuff.”
22 Wen Jesus hear dat, he tell him, “Ony one mo ting you neva do dat you gotta do. Go sell all da stuffs you get, an give da money to da peopo dat no mo notting. Den garans you goin get plenny good kine stuffs inside da sky. Den come wit me fo be my guy.” 23 Da guy hear dat, an he come real sad, cuz he get plenny rich stuffs.
24 Jesus look at him an tell, “Az why hard fo one rich guy fo get God fo his king! 25 Az mo easy fo one camel go thru da puka in one needle, den fo one rich guy fo get God fo his king.”
26 Da peopo dat wen hear him, dey tell, “If dass how gotta be, den who can get outa da bad kine stuff dey stay in?”
27 Jesus tell, “No mo nobody dat can do dat, but ony God, he da One dat can do um all.”
28 Den Peter tell, “Eh Boss, look! Us guys wen leave eryting we get fo go wit you.”
29 Jesus tell, “Az right! An I tell you, erybody dat leave his home o wife o braddahs o faddah an muddah o kids fo God da King, 30 he goin get plenny mo now in dis time, an bumbye he goin get da real kine life dat goin stay to da max foeva!”
Jesus Tell One Mo Time He Goin Mahke
(Matthew 20:17-19; Mark 10:32-34)
31 Jesus take his twelve guys by da side a da road, an tell um, “Eh, lissen, us goin go Jerusalem. I da Fo Real Kine Guy, an eryting da guys dat wen talk fo God befo time wen tell bout me, goin happen. 32 Dey goin turn me ova to da guys dass not Jew guys. Dey goin make fun a me, an talk any kine to me, an spit on me, an whip me hard, an kill me. 33 But day numba three, I goin come back alive.”
34 Jesus guys, dey neva know wat he mean. Jalike someting stay hide from dem.
Jesus Make One Blind Begga Guy
Come Good
(Matthew 20:29-34; Mark 10:46-52)
35 Jesus come Jericho town, an one blind guy stay sit an beg by da side a da road. 36 Da blind guy hear all da peopo pass, an he tell um, “Wass happening?”
37 Dey tell him, “Jesus from Nazaret stay pass.”
38 Den he yell, “Jesus! You King David boy! Pity me an give me chance!”
39 Da peopo in front scold him an tell him fo shut up. But he yell mo loud, “David boy! Pity me an give me chance!”
40 So Jesus stop an tell da peopo fo bring da blind guy by him. Wen he come nea, Jesus tell him, 41 “Wat you like me do fo you?”
He tell, “Boss, I like see.”
42 Den Jesus tell him, “See den! You wen trus me. Az why now you see.”
43 Right den an dea da guy see, an he go wit Jesus, talking bout how awesome God. Wen all da peopo see dat, dey tell God “Mahalo plenny!” an talk good bout him.

18:14 18:14: Matt 23:12; Luke 14:11

18:20 18:20 a: Outa 20:14; Rules2 5:18; b: Outa 20:13; Rules2 5:17; c: Outa 20:15; Rules2 5:19; d: Outa 20:16; Rules2 5:20; e: Outa 20:12; Rules2 5:16