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Da North Side Ohanas Dump Rehoboam
Rehoboam go Shekem town, cuz az da place all da Israel peopo come togedda fo make um come king. Dat same time Jeroboam, Nebat boy, still stay Egypt side. He wen go dea cuz he was sked King Solomon goin kill um. But wen Jeroboam hear dat Rehoboam come king, he leave Egypt fo go home. Da Israel peopo sen somebody fo tell Jeroboam fo go Shekem side, so he go ova dea. Den Jeroboam an all da odda Israel peopo dat wen come togedda, dey go talk to Rehoboam. Dey tell um, “Yoa faddah, he wen make us guys jalike cows an he put yoke on top us fo make us bus ass. But now, if you make da work we gotta do fo you mo easy, den we goin work fo you.”
Rehoboam tell um, “Give me three day. Den come back by me.” So da peopo go way.
Den King Rehoboam go meet wit da older leada guys dat work wit his faddah Solomon befo he mahke. He aks um, “Kay den. Wat you guys tink? Wat I goin tell dis peopo?”
Dey tell um, “If you can be one worka guy dat help dis peopo today, an work fo dem, an be up an up wit dem, dey goin stay work fo you all da time.”
But Rehoboam no lissen wat da older leada guys tell um fo do. He go talk to da young guys dat grow up wit him an dat stay by him. Rehoboam aks um, “Wat you guys tink I gotta do? Wat us guys goin tell dis peopo? Cuz dey stay tell me, ‘Try make da work we gotta do fo you mo easy! No give us da same heavy yoke yoa faddah wen put on top us!’ ”
10-11 Da young guys dat grow up wit Rehoboam tell um, “Dose peopo dat tell you, ‘Yoa faddah, he wen make us jalike cows an put heavy yoke on top us fo make us bus ass. But us like you fo make da work we gotta do fo you mo easy!’—go tell dem, ‘Yeah, my faddah wen make you guys jalike cows an put heavy yoke on top you fo make you bus ass. But you know wat?! I goin make da yoke mo heavy den dat! Jalike you goin tink my small finga, mo big den my faddah wais! My faddah wen whip you guys wit one regula kine whip, but I goin whip you guys wit scorpions!’ Dass wat we gotta tell um.”
12 Day numba three, Jeroboam an all da odda peopo come back by King Rehoboam, jalike he wen tell um fo do. 13 Da king talk real harsh to da peopo. He no lissen wat da older leadas tell um az good fo do. 14 He talk to dem da way da young guys wen tell um fo talk. He tell, “My faddah wen put jalike one heavy yoke, da kine dey use fo da cow, on top you guys fo make you bus ass. Me, I goin make da yoke mo heavy den dat! My faddah wen whip you guys wit one regula kine whip, an I goin whip you guys wit scorpions!” 15 An dass how was. Da king no lissen da peopo. But was Da One In Charge wen make um happen lidat. Cuz az da ting Da One In Charge wen tell Ahijah da Shiloh guy fo tell Jeroboam, Nebat boy, long time befoa.
16 12:16: 2Sam 20:1Wen all da Israel peopo see dat King Rehoboam no stay lissen dem, dey talk back to him. Dey tell um,
“Eh! You king guys from da David ohana,
You worth notting to us!
Us no get notting from da Jesse ohana!
Us Israel guys, we goin get outa hea!
You David ohana guys
Take kea yoa peopo,
No bodda us!”
So da Israel guys go home. 17 Cuz a dis, Rehoboam ony stay da king fo da Israel peopo dat live inside da Judah towns.
18 Den King Rehoboam sen Adoniram to da country side fo talk to da peopo. Him da leada boss fo all da guys dat go bus ass fo Rehoboam an no mo pay. But all da Israel peopo throw rock an kill Adoniram. King Rehoboam, he strong enuff fo jump real quick inside his war wagon an run away from dea to Jerusalem. 19 Az why still yet today, all da Israel peopo stay fight da David ohana, an no let um come dea king.
20 Wen all da odda Israel peopo find out dat Jeroboam come back from Egypt, dey sen somebody fo tell um, “Go come meet wit us!” Dey make him da king fo all da Israel peopo. Da Judah ohana was da ony ones dat stay tight wit da David kine king guys.
Shemaiah Talk Fo God To Rehoboam
21 Wen Rehoboam come back Jerusalem, he tell all da guys from da Judah an Benjamin ohanas fo come by him fo make one army. He get 180,000 guys from dem, ready fo make war wit da Israel ohanas, fo Rehoboam, Solomon boy, come king one mo time fo erybody.
22 But get one message from God fo Shemaiah, one guy dat know God fo real kine, fo tell dis: 23 “Talk to Rehoboam, Solomon boy, da king fo da Judah peopo, an to all da Judah an Benjamin peopo, an all da oddas too. 24 Tell um dis: ‘Dis wat Da One In Charge tell. No go ova dea fight wit yoa braddah guys da Israel ohana peopo. Go home, all you guys! Cuz I da One dat stay make all dis happen right now!’ ” Da peopo lissen wat Da One In Charge tell um, an dey go back home, jalike Da One In Charge tell um fo do.
Jeroboam Make Idol Kine Gods
Dat Look Jalike Bebe Cows
25 Den Jeroboam make strong da walls fo Shekem town, up country Efraim side. He go dea fo live. From dea, he go ova Peniel side an make strong da walls fo dat town too. 26 Cuz Jeroboam figga, “If I no do notting, bumbye da David ohana peopo from da Judah ohana, an dea king, goin take ova one mo time. 27 Ery year, dis peopo go Jerusalem town fo make one sacrifice inside da Temple Fo Da One In Charge. Bumbye, dey goin tink fo take da Judah king, Rehoboam, fo be dea boss one mo time. An if dey do dat, dey goin kill me an go back by him!”
28 12:28: Outa 32:4So King Jeroboam aks his helpa guys wat fo do. Den he tell his worka guys, “Make two idol kine gods outa gold, da kine dat look jalike bebe cows.”
Den he tell da peopo, “Eh, az too hard fo you guys go all da way Jerusalem side fo make sacrifice! Look now! Right hea, da gods fo you Israel peopo! Dis, da ones wen bring you guys hea from da Egypt land!”
29 Jeroboam put up one a da idol kine gods Bethel side nea da borda wit Judah, an da odda one in da north, Dan ohana side. 30 Cuz Jeroboam wen do dis, make plenny peopo do wat dey not suppose to do. Dey even wen go all da way Dan side fo pray to da idol kine god ova dea.
31 Jeroboam build small kine houses by da sacrifice places on top da hills fo pray. He take any kine peopo fo come prieses, even if dey not from da Levi ohana. 32 12:32: Pries 23:33-34Den Jeroboam tell da peopo dey gotta make one spesho religious kine ceremony ery year Octoba, same time jalike da spesho time wen da Judah peopo go live inside shacks. An Jeroboam make sacrifices on top da altar he wen build. He do dat Bethel side, fo make one sacrifice fo da idol kine gods he wen make, dat look jalike bebe cows. He get da peopo fo come prieses fo all da small kine sacrifice houses he wen build on top da hills fo pray to da odda gods too. 33 Octoba was da time Jeroboam pick fo be da spesho religious kine ceremony. He neva get dat time from God. Dat time, Jeroboam go da altar he wen build Bethel side. Dass how he make his spesho religious kine ceremony ony fo wen da Israel peopo all come togedda, an him da one, not da pries guys, go da altar an make da sacrifice.

12:16 12:16: 2Sam 20:1

12:28 12:28: Outa 32:4

12:32 12:32: Pries 23:33-34