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Jesus Make Da Guy Dat Work
Fo One Army Captain Come Good
(Matthew 8:5-13)
Wen Jesus pau teach da peopo all dat stuff, he go Capernaum town. One captain fo da Rome army guys ova dea get one sick worka guy. Da captain get plenny love an aloha fo him, an da guy litto mo mahke. Da captain hear bout Jesus, an he sen some older Jew leadas by him, fo tell him fo come an make his worka guy come good. Wen da leada guys come by Jesus, dey beg him real hard. Dey tell, “Dis captain, he one good guy. Az why dass good if you can help him. He get love an aloha fo oua Jew peopo, an he wen build oua church fo us.”
So Jesus go wit dem. Wen he come nea da house, da captain sen his frenz fo tell Jesus, “Boss, no need bodda you, cuz I no stay good enuff fo you come inside my house. Dass why I figga dat me no stay good enuff fo come by you. Jus tell da word, an my worka guy goin come good. You know, I get one army boss dat tell me wat fo do. An I tell my army guys wat fo do. I tell one guy, ‘Go,’ an he go. An I tell anodda guy, ‘Go come,’ an he come. An I tell my worka guy ‘Go do dis,’ an he do um.”
Wen Jesus hear dat, his jaw drop, an he tell all da peopo dat stay dea, “Ho! Dis guy get um! No mo no Israel peopo dat trus me lidat!”
10 Den da guys da captain sen go back da house, an dey see dat da worka guy come good awready.
Jesus Make One Widow Boy
Come Alive One Mo Time
11 Afta dat Jesus go Nain town. His guys an plenny odda peopo go wit him. 12 Wen Jesus come da town gate, da peopo from da town carry one open box wit one mahke guy inside thru da gate. His muddah one widow, an he her ony boy. Plenny peopo from da town go wit her. 13 Da Boss Jesus spock her, an he get pity fo her. He tell, “No cry now.”
14 Den Jesus go an touch da open box wit da guy inside, an da guys dat stay carry um stan dea. He tell, “Eh, brah, I tell you, sit up!” 15 Da mahke guy sit up, an start fo talk, an Jesus give him back to his muddah.
16 Erybody come real sked, an dey talk good bout God lidis, “Az one importan guy dat talk fo God come by us! God come fo take kea his peopo!” 17 An dey tell all dis stuff bout Jesus all ova Judea an all da place aroun dea.
Da Guys John Da Baptiza Guy Sen
(Matthew 11:2-19)
18 Da guys dat John Da Baptiza Guy stay teach tell John all dis stuff. He tell two a his guys fo come by him, 19 an tell dem fo go by Jesus, Da One In Charge, an aks him, “Eh, you da guy suppose to come, o wat? O we suppose to wait fo anodda guy fo come?”
20 Wen dey come by Jesus dey tell, “John Da Baptiza guy wen sen us by you fo aks, ‘Eh, you da guy suppose to come, o us suppose to wait fo anodda guy fo come?’ ” 21 Dat time Jesus stay make plenny guys come good from all kine sick, an make da bad kine spirits no bodda plenny peopo no moa, an make plenny blind guys see. 22  Jesus tell um, “Go, tell John wat you guys stay hear an see. Had guys dat no can see, now dey can see. Had guys dat no can walk, now dey can walk. Had guys dat get da lepa kine sick, now dey no mo da sick. Had guys dat no can hear, now dey can hear. Had guys dat wen mahke, now dey alive! Da peopo dat no mo notting, now dey hear all da Good Kine Stuff From God dat I stay teach dem. 23 An if da tings I do no bodda you, den you goin stay good inside too.”
24 Afta John messenja guys go way, Jesus tell all da peopo bout John. “Wat you guys wen go da boonies fo see? Da wind shaking one bamboo? 25 Nah! Kay den, wat you guys go ova dea fo see? One guy wit fancy kine clotheses? You know wat? Da guys dat wear fancy kine clotheses an get all kine rich stuffs, dey stay inside da king palace. 26 If not dat, wat you guys wen go fo see? One guy dat talk fo God? Dass right! I tell you, John, he mo den jus one guy dat talk fo God. 27  Dis da guy da Bible talk bout befo time: ‘I goin sen my messenja guy befo you come. He goin make eryting ready fo you, befo you come ova dea.’ ” 28 An Jesus tell, “I like tell you guys dis: No mo nobody eva born dat mo importan den John. But even da mostes small kine guy dat get God fo his king, he mo importan den John.”
29  Wen da guys dat colleck tax money an all da odda peopo hear dat, dey tell, “Yeah! God erytime do da right ting!” Cuz dey wen lissen John, an he baptize dem. 30 But da Pharisee guys an da teachas dat teach da Rules From God, dey neva do wat God like dem fo do, an dey neva like fo John baptize dem.
31 Jesus tell, “But da peopo nowdays, how dem? 32 Dey jalike da kids dat stay sit inside da open market place, an stay yell to dea frenz, ‘Eh! Us guys play da flute fo you guys, but you guys no like dance! Us guys sing one sad funeral song, but you guys no like cry.’ 33 Same ting, wen John Da Baptiza show up, he skip food plenny fo him pray, an he no drink wine. Dass why you guys tell, ‘He get one bad kine spirit in charge a him!’ 34 But me, I da Fo Real Kine Guy. I come, I eat, I drink, an you guys tell, ‘You know wat? Dis guy erytime stay eat an drink! He frenz wit da tax guys, an da odda kine guys dat get one bad rep too.’ 35 No matta wat me an John do, you guys no like! But da good guy dat get da smarts from God, da tings he do goin show proof dat he right.”
Jesus Go One Pharisee Guy House Fo Eat
36 One Pharisee guy tell Jesus fo come his house fo eat. So Jesus go ova dea an sit down by da table. 37  Had one wahine from dat town dat do bad kine stuff an fool aroun. She hear dat Jesus stay sit inside da Pharisee guy house, an she bring one bottle da kine dey make from da alabaster kine stone, full wit perfume. 38 She stan behind Jesus by his feets. She stay cry, an her tears make his feets wet. Den she wipe his feets wit her hair, kiss um, an pour da perfume on top dem.
39 Wen da Pharisee guy dat tell um fo come see dat, he tink, “Eh, if dis guy was one guy dat talk fo God fo real kine, den he know wat kine wahine stay touch him. He know she one wahine dat do bad kine stuff.”
40 Jesus tell him, “Eh Simon, I like tell you someting.” Simon tell, “Yeah, Teacha? Tell me.”
41 “Had two guys dat owe some money to one guy dat lend money. One guy owe him five hundred piece silva, an da odda guy fifty piece silva. 42 Dey no can pay him back. Az why da guy tell, ‘Dass okay. Foget um.’ Wat guy you figga goin get mo plenny love an aloha fo him?”
43 Simon tell, “I figga da guy dat owe him moa.”
Jesus tell, “Right on.”
44 Den Jesus turn aroun to da wahine, an tell Simon, “You see dis wahine? I wen come inside yoa house, an you neva give me watta fo wash my feet. But she wash um wit her tears an wipe um wit her hair. 45 You neva tell ‘Aloha’ an give me one kiss, but wen I come inside yoa house, dis wahine no pau kiss my feets. 46 You neva give me olive oil fo my head fo show me respeck, but she cova my feets wit her perfume. 47 Az why I tell you, she wen do plenny bad kine stuff, but God let her go awready an hemo her shame fo all dat. An how come he do dat? Cuz she get plenny love an aloha fo God now, az why. Da guy dat do litto bit bad stuff, an God hemo his shame fo dat, he ony goin get litto bit love an aloha fo God.”
48 Den Jesus tell da wahine, “God hemo da shame awready fo all da bad kine stuff you wen do.”
49 An da odda guys sitting ova dea start fo talk to each odda, “Who dis guy? He even hemo da shame fo da bad kine stuff peopo do!”
50 Jesus tell da wahine, “Cuz you trus me, God take you outa da bad kine stuff you wen do. Go, an no worries.”
7:22 7:22 a: Isa 35:5-6; Isa 61:1 7:27 7:27: Mal 3:1 7:29 7:29: Matt 21:32; Luke 3:12 7:37 7:37: Matt 26:7; Mark 14:3; John 12:3